Tips for Cultivating a Healthier Sex Life in 2023
New year, new me! Right...?
When one thinks of new year's resolutions, many feelings of anxiety may arise. Each new year is a chance to reflect and see what is working for us and what is not, and for some folks, this process can be incredibly daunting, energy-draining, or hard to confront. There is no pressure to change who you are overnight, but of course, taking account of things we would like to improve in our lives while setting realistic expectations for the new year doesn't have to be so difficult. Here at Wet for Her, we honor taking the time to cultivate a life worth living that aligns with our goals, boundaries, and dreams for our future. For some folks, cultivating a healthier sex life can be a goal or priority for the new year and we are all aboard with supporting those actively working on improving their sex life and relationship with themselves and others.
Improving your sex life doesn't have to mean having more sex. Improving your sex life looks like learning how to hold your boundaries, learning how to effectively communicate, getting in touch with your body, or even putting yourself out in the dating pool a little more often. It is different for every person and is most definitely a personalized journey toward empowerment.
With that being said, we'd like to share our best tips and advice for cultivating a healthier sex life this year for 2023!
Tip 1: Check What is Working and What is Not
Reviewing your intimate life can mean many things to different people. Sitting down with yourself or your partner and reviewing what has been helping or not helping can make this process a little more easier. To start, create a list of your boundaries, your hard yeses and no's, and what you are looking for in a sexual partner or during your sexual encounters. This doesn't have to be a written list, but we sure do recommend it as writing things down has the tendency to bring things to light that otherwise might have been hiding in the shadows. Make sure you prioritize the things that give you pleasure and remember to always align yourself with what feels right to you. Creating a list helps sort out all the thoughts in our heads while creating a balanced way to review everything that might have been lost in translation. Be compassionate with yourself as you discover (or rediscover) these facets of your sexuality and your desires. It's okay if you haven't met certain expectations or goals. What matters is the awareness of what you want and don't want.
Tip 2: Go Get Tested!
This one is kind of a no brainer. To achieve a healthier sex life, it is vital that we all get tested and stay on top of our sexual health. Hotties get tested so do your due diligence! Try to make getting tested before and after a new partner a habit, we guarantee it'll be a lifesaver. And remember - you're allowed to ask partners to get tested too!
Tip 3: Communicate, Communicate, Communicate
Communication is perhaps one of the most underrated forms of sex advice you can get. You would be surprised how effective it is in getting what you want and need out of your sexual experiences. No one is a mind reader, and if you happen to be one, then that's cool. The point is it's important to communicate your wants, desires, and needs to achieve a healthy sex life. Start off by setting time with your partner(s) to discuss facets of the sexual and intimate relationship which are important for you and you all as a couple. Communicating boundaries, having safe words, and even having a debriefing post or pre-sex can be incredibly rewarding and enlightening. Remember to start off with one thing at a time so none of you become overwhelmed.
Tip 4: Invest In Yourself
Investing in yourself looks different for many folks. The reason it looks and feels different is because every individual needs something that is curated for their own sexual well-being. This can mean making sure you look and feel your best. Getting a makeover or buying/thrifting new clothes can be it for some people. However, some folks decide to invest in sexual coaching, sex therapy, couples therapy, or even investing in a new sex toy or sexual accessory. Whatever it is that makes you pop off, invest in it. It's important to remember that when we feel our best, we perform our best - whatever that may be in our lives.
Thinking of investing in a new pleasure product? We have a wide assortment of premium products available on our website. Here at Wet for Her, we want to make sure you feel included and like your sexuality matters. Want to check out our selections? Head over to wetforher.com to buy your new toy or accessory today!
Tip 5: Be Open to New Experiences
Being adventurous and open to new experiences can be daunting. However, it is important to never close yourself off to new experiences and people. This in fact, can be the catalyst for many amazing opportunities. You never know what can happen or what can change. Practicing radical acceptance and self-compassion is integral to adding new sexual experiences into our life. If you feel you aren't ready, then you shouldn't pressure yourself! Being open to new experiences doesn't mean you have to force yourself into these sexual experiences or experiences in general which you don't feel 100% present for. Being open to new experiences means being mindful of your current body's needs and wants and executing a plan to meet these needs and wants by expanding your comfort zone. It's okay to push yourself past your comfort zone, just make sure you do it whenever you're ready!
We hope these tips provided some clarity and solutions for your next steps in achieving a more balanced and healthier sex life. Whatever part of your sexual journey that you are on, we are here to support you!
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About the author:
Victory (they/them) is a latine trans non-binary content creator, artist, social media advisor, and community healer. With several years of experience as a mentor and advocate for the queer community, Victory boasts a passion for sexual wellness, trauma-informed healing, social justice issues, and intersectional advocacy for the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC community. In their spare time, Victory enjoys spending time outside in nature, DJ'ing, creating art, playing video games, and playing with hula hoops and fire. You can find and support their community work, art, and business at @flowingfrequency on Instagram.