Oral sex with a woman or any person with a pussy is known as cunnilingus, eating pussy, eating out, going down on someone…etc. It comes from the Latin cunnus which means vulva, and lingere, to lick. So yes, in the literal sense, it involves licking the vulva, but it’s not quite that simple. Eating pussy tends to focus on clitoral stimulation, and while licking is often indeed involved, that’s not the whole story, nor would you want it to be. The nuances of this kind of oral sex act, like all sex acts, depend on your body and that of your partner, and of course, enthusiastic consent and clear communication. The goal: sexual pleasure. Get ready for a detailed deep dive into the how-tos of cunnilingus.
A little anatomy lesson
Just to make sure you know your way around the vulva, we’ll run through its most important parts, from top to bottom, as well as the surrounding areas.
Clitoral hood & clitoris
The clitoral hood is a small flap of skin covering and protecting the clitoris. Hidden beneath the hood, the clitoris is a tiny nub of flesh with lots of nerve endings – likely where you will focus your cunnilingus efforts.
Labia majora & labia minora
The lips of the vulva, the labia are flaps of skin. The labia majora are much larger than the labia minora.
Urethral opening
This is where urine comes out of and you will likely not be focusing on this area.
Vagina
A sensitive opening you can stimulate with your mouth, hands, or a sex toy.
Anus
The anus has many nerve endings (though no natural lubrication) and it can also be stimulating with your mouth or fingers but that would be the subject of a different article…
G-spot and A-spot
These are two of the erogenous zones for people with vulvas. Erogenous zones are particularly sensitive and can lead to sexual arousal when stimulated. The G-spot is located in the anterior wall of the vagina, and provides access to the clitoris from the inside (reachable by inserting and curling your finger up toward the stomach). The A-spot is located deeper inside and can be hard to reach with a finger – it’s more easily accessible with a sex toy.
How to eat a girl out
Now that you’ve got the lay of the land, wondering how to go down on a woman or any person with a vagina? Where to start? How to give your partner the most sexual pleasure? Don’t just dive right in, tongue out and flailing. There’s an art to it all, some pacing, some technique, some trial and error, too.
Start with kissing
Your mouth will be the primary tool of sexual pleasure here, so you can start with kissing, working your way down their body from face towards their vulva. Move slowly, to build anticipation and enhance pleasure. Use your lips, your tongue, your mouth as a whole.
Build anticipation
Play with pacing and pressure to build anticipation. Take your time, do a little bit of teasing. Don’t be afraid to kiss, suck, blow and lick the various parts of their vulva, building pressure and sensitivity, priming the clitoris for stimulation. But save the clit for last.
Find the clit
Once you’ve built ample anticipation, it’s time to zero in on the clitoris – that little bean of flesh that’s so full of nerve endings. Use your fingers or tongue to find it at the top of the labia. All bodies are different, so don’t be afraid to ask for directions. And from here on in…there are lots of ways to make your partner feel good. In terms of specific oral sex techniques, we’ll get down to that below.
Check in
As with all sex, make sure you have enthusiastic consent along the way and continue to communicate and check in with your partner about what feels good.
The best cunnilingus methods and tips
We’ve gone through the approximate steps of how to go down on a woman or anyone with a vulva, but what are the specific oral sex techniques or methods you can use? There are infinite ways to use your mouth on someone’s vulva to bring them pleasure – here we will focus on several.
Use your hands…or a toy
While technically cunnilingus is about using your tongue, we definitely recommend taking advantage of your fingers and possibly a sex toy. While you’re stimulating one part of them, you can use a vibrator to work another. And if you’re aiming for one of the more deeply buried erogenous zones (like the G-spot or A-spot), using a dildo can help you go the distance (otherwise you’ll have to reach and try curling your finger). More tools can definitely mean more pleasure.
Pancake
The pancake method involves sticking your tongue out of your mouth, flattening your tongue, making it wide and moving your head (not your tongue) up towards the clit. Then pull away and repeat, down to up. Keep your tongue flat and wide – don’t apply too much pressure and don’t go too fast. Increase pressure based on your partner’s reactivity.
Vortex
For the vortex, shape your mouth into a small “O” and suck on the clitoris. Here you can play with pacing and rhythm…and when to release.
The Kivin method
This is a whole different side of cunnilingus, literally. Rather than placing yourself between their legs, put yourself beside them. Access their clit, anchoring your index finger and thumb on either side, and then lick from from side to side across the clit or clitoral hood.
Get them on top
To really switch things up, have your partner sit on your face, or be otherwise placed above your mouth (this could be an all fours position). This gives them more control and gives you different angles to access sensitive areas.
The infinite pleasures of cunnilingus
There are so many ways to play when it comes to how to eat pussy. Different combinations of tongue, fingers and toys (hello strap ons and vibrators) paired with varied pacing, rhythm and types of penetration (if any) can lead to infinite pleasure.
Remember that while orgasm can and often does happen through oral sex, it isn’t always guaranteed in the moment or for that person. It is pleasure that is the measure of success here. You simply want them to feel good. So always, aim for that.
